The story below is from our March/April 2024 issue. For more stories like it, Subscribe Today. Thank you!
You might be surprised at how rewarding it is to take a moment and admire the beauty in your day-to-day life.
You may have come across the hashtag on social media in recent years, #romanticizeyourlife. These posts are often accompanied with images of steaming teacups and perfectly plated pastries, softly filtered lighting on an open book or a fresh bouquet of flowers artfully arranged in a beautiful vase. What’s striking about the content is that rather than highlighting a major event or exotic location, these moments are usually collected from a person’s ordinary, everyday life.
Rather than waiting for Something Big to come along to highlight, the #romanticizeyourlife trend is a call to action that asks us to shift our perspective around the daily routines, objects and activities we might otherwise overlook. How can we make the things we do every day feel special? Is there a way to make our most mundane habits more enjoyable?
Answering these questions is a deeply individual journey: While one person might say that using their grandma’s china for their coffee is the perfect way to elevate their morning, another might decide that their fast food breakfast sandwich eaten on commute while listening to a podcast is the ideal start to their day. The purpose of romanticizing your life isn’t to create the same aesthetically-pleasing Instagram photo, but to slow down and notice the day-to-day details that bring you joy. It is a kind of mindfulness practice, one that transforms the details of your life from background noise into the spotlight; you are, after all, the main character of your own life.
The reality is that the majority of us, our lives aren’t made up of glamorous vacations and major milestones, but of our habits, chores, domestic responsibilities and work tasks that can fill our days without leaving much of a mark on our memories at all. Choosing to romanticize even the forgettable or unpleasant details of our lives boosts our gratitude, can help relieve anxiety and imbue even the smallest moments with meaning.
Curious about ways to romanticize your life? Here are some tips to keep in mind:
Start with What’s Already There
Romanticizing your life is not about making big changes: This is not a practice that asks you to overhaul your routines, buy a new wardrobe or become a different person altogether. This is about finding ways to make the things you are already doing all the time become more enjoyable.
What do you do every day? Make a list of what makes up your typical day, starting with your wake-up routine. Then begin to think about small shifts that could make each activity more pleasant — these should be easily accessible changes! This is not about creating challenges for yourself, but making the mundane just a little more magical.
I like to have some time to myself before the morning rush of getting my daughter ready for school and myself ready for work. Even just ten minutes to let the dogs out and drink my first few sips of coffee in the early quiet is enough. If I can, a full hour to myself so I can read, write or even sit by the fire (or on the porch, depending on the season) to let my mind wander and not be doing anything can feel like the most delicious luxury.
Adding a few minutes before or after a busy time of day is a simple, free place to start.
Be Your Own Enjoyment Concierge
Remember the timeless wisdom of Mary Poppins: “A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down.” Now that you have the list of your daily grind, what are the metaphorical spoons of sugar that would make each activity more pleasant for you, specifically?
While I’m folding the seemingly endless piles of laundry, I like to listen to audiobooks. If I’m listening to something particularly riveting, I will sometimes find myself looking for more chores to do, just so I can find out what happens next. Maybe you’re a music lover, and creating some playlists for doing the dishes can make the chore feel more upbeat and fun. Maybe saving a particular TV show for the treadmill will help the run fly by.
Other ways to make ordinary moments feel special can come down to the simplest details: An at-home online yoga class can go from a task on my to-do list to something I look forward to all day if I simply take the time to put on my favorite matching workout clothes and to light a really nice candle. If I have a day of emails ahead of me, maybe I paint my nails before I get started so I can admire my manicure all day. Instead of scrolling through social media between meetings, maybe I take a travel mug of my favorite tea on a short walk around the block.
There isn’t really a detail that’s too small here: Be particular about your pens, the surface of your workspace, the vessels you use to drink from all day. If you think about what elevates an ordinary hotel experience to a luxury one, it often comes down to these tiny amenities. Think about your senses: The smell around you, the feel of the everyday objects you look at and touch, the sounds that bring you the most energy or help to calm you down. Keep a bowl of mints or hard candy nearby, or establish a daily break for your favorite cup of tea. If you have a bouquet of flowers on your table, take it from room to room with you so you can enjoy them all day. You might be surprised how much these little things can boost the quality of even the most uneventful day.
Call Your Attention to the Small Joys
Here is the part that is really important: After you have taken the time to light your candles for dinner, or given yourself a mini-concert in your car, or sipped sparkling water with cucumber in the sunlight, take notice of your pleasure. This means pausing in the moment to more fully enjoy it. Savor the sensations, bask in them, even if for just a few breaths. Romanticizing your life is about cultivating gratitude and feeling alive, and this comes not just from creating lovely moments but from naming them and drawing your attention to them.
I sometimes find that taking a photo helps to solidify the feeling, whether I share it or not. I might also write down the moment in my planner or calendar, or even just remember to tell my husband about it when we debrief our days to each other later. However you find that works for you, don’t skip this step: As the great cultural philosopher Ferris Bueller said, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”
The story above is from our March/April 2024 issue. For more stories like it, Subscribe Today. Thank you!